Always remember to dare.

What’s important to you now, at this point of time, at this point of your life?

*stunned*

Source:

Yahoo news

People.com

Been more than a year since I’ve last posted a proper one here.

True, a lot of shizz has happened within the year. But I suddenly didn’t feel the need to write it down anymore.

The sudden desire to keep everything in my life private.

Yea, there’re times I wanna write about stuff that happened, but that moment disappears as soon as I even think of blogging it. -.-

I think I’ve lost the ability to put things into words, to have a smooth train of thought, to actually write it down.. To let people know what I’ve been up to..

I mean, I’ve been updating quite a handful of people about what’s going on, but it’s all verbally, and I think that’s enough.

I’m growing old. :’(

On the other hand, I’m quite happy where I am.

Would like to change other things, but as of now, I’m happy.

And oh! This thought that I’ve been having for years, suddenly scares me!

Horror!!!!

Smells funky in ‘ere!

=)

Does anyone even come back here?

Can’t use MSN at work.

I’m bored you know?

Bored to the level of deprivation.

I feel so cut off from the world…

Though… I found another way to chat, and The Boy’s the only one I chat to since I can’t remember all the other email addresses to add on that chatting thingy. But that isn’t really a good tool to chat cause sometimes my messages or his messages get lost.

Ah well. We’d just do with that and SMSes.

Work’s been alright… Still learning the ropes….

Ain’t used to waking up before the sun rises, but what the heck. Location’s good, pay’s good, job scope seems good for the moment.

I’m sleepy though. Heh.

And I’m going out now. Ta!

Seriously got a lot of getting used to to do.

It’s so different.

Too different for my liking.

Adapt Lisa, adapt. You’ve done that for the past 5 years, you can do it again.

These couple of months, besides juggling settling back into the Singapore lifestyle, finding a job, and spending time with The Boy, I’ve also been doing some temporary work. Thankfully, 2 of the jobs I did were at the Singapore Expo, which is just opposite my house – 12 minutes walk.

Hahaha! I save on transportation!

Both the exhibitions were for traders only, and I’ve met a lot of different people from different countries. I can also tell you the majority of kaisu people are not Singaporeans. =p

The first one was for Dimes Juice (It’s pronounced “dee-mess”). It’s a Turkish brand, and I must say, the 2 Turkish people I worked with were hilarious beyond words. They’re noisy and rowdy, and so full of energy and fun to work with.

The second was for the Japanese International Apparel and Machinery exhibition just last week. I was the interpreter for a Japanese company.

At first, I was really doubtful of my Japanese proficiency level. Afterall, I was being paid a lot, and I didn’t want to screw up on this.

I was glad that my fears were unnecessary as I met a lot of nice people, and even met a German lady who was an interpreter for the same company too! We worked together for 4 days, and I really enjoyed hearing about Berlin through her.

At the end of the 4 days, the President of the company was really happy with my work, that he gave me a huge tip! I was seriously shocked at the amount, considering it’s a tip, and considering that they’re paying me a lot by the hour…

I feel so rich. Hahaha!

Keep doing this kinda temporary jobs every week and I might just be able to call it a full time job considering I could earn up to the normal fresh grad’s salary! Hahaha!

*****

Back to the cruel workforce I go!

RAWR!

I need to shop for office wear. How ah? I hate office wear to the core leh..

*****

Call me crazy, but while people are reading books, I’m reading a dictionary. Dictionary of Sociology.

It’s really interesting, especially since I’ve been interested in the philosophers’ point of view regarding religion.

I’ll always remember this sentence my lecturer said: Religion is just the society worshipping each other.

Religion was not based on erroneous belief, but responded to the human need for meaning. It was not individualistic, but social and collective. It was about symbol and ritual, rather than belief and knowledge.

I’ve met a lot of people who have a religion, but don’t believe/approve of what their religion says. In fact, a lot of them are just having that religion because they were born with it.

There are 2 ways they can go about it – announce that they officially “don’t want” their religion, or just let the religion stick on their application forms, but don’t believe the crap.

If I were them, I’d choose the second option too. So that I can leave people puzzled when I say “Oh, I’m (insert religion here), but I don’t believe in that crap.”

Hur.

And I find it even funnier/hypocritical of people when they say they are staunch (insert religion here), but contradict what their religion says.

Like the whole premarital sex thing tying in with religion.

Utter bullshit.

Ultimately, people just need to believe in something to live.

Like how people believe in miracles and crap like that.

I only believe what I see. And I’ll only believe when there is abso-fucking-lutely no scientific/logical explanation for what I saw. Only then, will I believe.

*****

I have a tattoo on my lower back that reads “Cogito ergo sum“. It’s a famous quote from Rene Descartes, a philosopher. He is the one who discovered he could doubt virtually everything, save that in doubting, and so thinking, he must at least exist. Thus, cogito ergo sum, which means “I think, therefore I am.”

I first got to know of this quote when I was in my first semester, first year of uni. I was doing literature (Yes, I did a semester of literature where the English was Victorian times English!!), and was required to watch this show called Blade Runner, a very old show.

At first, I was quite disgusted at the thought of watching an old film. But decided to be objective about it since I did enjoy Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein film.

Blade Runner is a film that basically questions what it is to be human, and why life is so precious.

 And I did enjoy that film.

It was a really mentally stimulating film.

Anyway, back to Descartes. He said the existence thus asserted as not his bodily existence, but rather, the existence of the self as a ‘thinking thing’. He required proof of the existence of God, to restore his confidence in the existence of material bodies, defined by their spatial existence. Descartes himself have experienced great difficulty in accounting coherently for the special connection between mind and body which constitutes the human person.

See, even people long long long time ago had doubts about God.

With regards to self. Are you a “I”, or a “ME”?

The “I” is spontaneous, inner, creative, and subjective; and the “ME” which is the organized attitudes of others, connects to the wider society, is more social and determined.

Ultimately, the “ME” is often how people see themselves through the eyes of others, and is much more amenable to study.

Sidetrack a little, this tattoo has been attracting a lot of people’s attention. Those who can read Latin, and those who can’t.

I find it amusing when those who can’t read it as it is spelt “cogito ergo sum”, which they read as “co-gee-toe er-go some”. Anyway, they always ask what it means, and I’d tell them what it means, to which they’ll ask where I got it from bla bla bla.

As for those who can read Latin, they tend to test me on the reading, the meaning, and who’s quote it is.

To which I’d tell them “I won’t get a tattoo if I don’t know what it means, and if I am not goddamn sure of its spelling and meaning.”

It takes something like that to shut them up.

Been reading all my entries since I first started this blog more than a year ago. Feb 2007 to be exact. That’s about the time I was leaving for Japan.

Deleted a lot of crap, edits, and of course, a lot of reminiscences.

Especially when I read entries on my partner (receptionist partner, that is.) and Cheche.

I really do miss the both of them. Now that my partner’s all alone, minding the reception counter herself, she’s having it tough.

I miss her and all the klutzy things she does. She’s so down-to-earth. I’ve never met anyone like her before. I wish I could be so carefree like she is.

Cheche… I miss her and her brutal honesty. She’s another one I get along with very well.

These are the 2 people I’m still in contact with.

And I miss them so much because they made my time in Osaka so much fun-er.

I was reading an entry dated August 14. And I was just laughing to myself.

It’s funny how I portrayed someone as a very nice person, and then suddenly, I saw the friggin’ ugly side of them.

This is an excerpt from the entry.

Things got pretty rough during my trip back to Singapore.
It wasn’t a holiday, like all people would like to think.
I was back home for work, as a translator.
Being home again for 2 odd weeks was great, but the work factor’s not.

I was so close to losing my job due to unrational thinking. Definately not on my part.

It doesn’t affect me much, and hey, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

In all honesty, what happened was entirely not my fault.
So when I say I’m the most innocent person in that whole hoo-ha, I’m telling the truth.
I was practically watching the whole event unfold with my eyes wide opened, and my chin hitting the ground.
Yea, I was that innocent, believe it or not.

Amazed at how I carried myself even though I was being shouted at in the main lobby of a hotel.
Hey, I walked into the hotel the next day with my head held high.
I was a punching bag, and I did no wrong. Even they know it’s not my fault.

I guess they just needed an outlet to vent their frustrations.

“You know it ain’t your fault, so don’t undermine yourself and your capabilities.”

In the end, I still gave my job up.

Let it go Lisa.. Let it go.

There’s no point bearing a grudge anymore. It’s over.

I learned. And I grew.

I’m happy being back in Singapore. About time I came back home, after 5 years away from home.

On a totally different note..

I bought this in Japan in December if I’m not wrong, and me being me, I’m really bad with anything white – clothes, shoes.. You name it, I’m bad with it.

But hey, this little darling is still very much in its original state!

When something means a lot to you (basically this does because I bought it.), you learn how to treasure it and treat it with care.

My wallet’s doing fine too. =)

Now I’m itching for the speedy I’ve always wanted. Then I saw the Marc Jacobs bag going for almost a grand.

Crap.

No no. I’ve gotta save up for more important things in life!

Went up the Singapore Flyer on Saturday night.

I think I’ve been to too many ferris wheels, that I no longer know how to appreciate the view. Or perhaps, it’s because the view in Japan is much nicer than it is here. I also reckon that the view would be better once the IR is up. Because all I see now are cranes, cranes… And more cranes.

Before boarding the Singapore Flyer, we went for the Fish Spa. Everything also must try once!

It was extremely ticklish for the first few minutes. I was clenching my toes because I hated it when the fishes went between my toes! I’m so afraid that when I’m trying to move my toes, I’d squish one of them fishes, and be called a murderer. Hur!

The ticklish-ness… I couldn’t get used to it. It was only til the last 5 minutes or so, that I got a little used to the ticklish-ness. And that meant not watching what the suckers were doing to my feet, else I’d get squirmish again.

$26 (or was it $28?) for half an hour of…. Being eaten. Quite fun actually. Feet’s smoother after the half an hour. Or if you like being tickled, try it. But then again, you pay me $26 I’ll tickle your feet with a feather for half an hour lor. I’d even throw in the feather for you to take home and smell display.

If you’re wondering why I’m not working yet, keep wondering. Asking won’t get you an answer, because I refuse to answer and explain myself.

And if you’re wondering about the cash flow, it’s flowing alright, at a good rate too. No no, I’m not spending. Money’s coming in!

And no, it’s nothing illicit! I still have to contribute to CPF lor. *grumbles grumbles*

IF you’re still wondering what I’m talking about, don’t bother asking also. Hahaha!

I’ve decided to keep certain aspects of my life under wraps. You can ask ask ask, even my parents don’t get answers from me sometimes.

I’m a secret agent.

Not.

Really.

I’m having a pain in my neck. Literally. Left side of my neck hurts. Actually, it’s more annoying than it is painful.

I think my neighbours are cursing me for blasting my music ever since I’ve gotten new speakers. Everything’s about bass baby!

I’m being banned from putting on makeup. Ok… Not exactly banned.. But discouraged. Actually, it’s very hassle-free too. I like! Wake up, wash up, good to go. And I also found a new way to utilise the extra 10 minutes I usually spend on putting on makeup.

Go figure.

My sister’s growing into a fine lady. Fine in a sense that for every dirty thing that comes out her mouth, I’d love to fine her 10 cents.

I’d be rich.

Ok lah… She still has the innocent side of her. Acting innocent is her forte. Muhahaha!

I should stop talking about her coz she’ll read my blog and probably put a cockroach in my room while I’m out.

Oh wait. She already sort of did that in the toilet.

The US dollars is weak now, figure it’s a good time to go to the U.S of A. But we’re keeping that plans for a couple months later. Hopefully the US dollars stay weak.

And hopefully the prices of everything goes down too. Petrol is crazy. Even Hans increased the price of their apple pie! By 30 freaking cents!

Don’t want to buy already.

Mustafa has some really cheap and good stuff. I should emphasize the word some… Although I don’t really fancy going there too often. If you have to ask me why, you suck.

The brownies my aunt brought back from the Philippines are the bomb! I’m craving for them now. *drool drool*

I’m so not happy with the Malaysian Dreamgirl result. Ewww. That woman actually won.

Ew, ew, ew.

I agree the show should be named “Her Family’s Dreamgirl”.

Ya ya, I watched MDG. Quite addictive actually.

I was actually rooting for Jay or Fiqa. I love Fiqa! She’s so versatile! And Jay, I think she has everything a model should have lah. Tall, and she can carry any look.

Ok, so in other words, they’re both versatile.

Was quite surprised when Jay and Ringo were dropped. Basically, I was quite shocked that one of the Top 3 girls were actually there.

Why ah? Every pose she does is like she’s sulking.

Sulk sulk sulk.

I haven’t been clubbing for the longest time. I haven’t drank for the longest time too. Ok, excluding the bottle of Moet & Chandon The Boy and I had, I haven’t drank for the longest time.

By drank, I mean the drink-until-I-am-so-friggin’-high-or-puking-my-guts-out kind of drink.

Actually, I don’t miss it. (Evil twin: Hm.. Really?)

Shuddup evil little one.

I haven’t been shopping and spending much too. Mainly because I’m saving up for more important things in life.

(Evil twin: Like LV.)

SILENCE!!!!! I KEEL YOU! (Go watch Youtube “Jeff Dunham” and his dead suicide *debabomber*, Achmed. It’s so funny.)

No evil bitch. For a house and a dog The Car.

I’m thinking of getting inked again, again, again, again, and again. (Hahaha!) The Boy said I’m gonna end up being a drawing block. I think so too.

I’ve actually gotten compliments for my tatts! Especially the one on my lower back. The foreigners I worked with were actually impressed that I could pronounce that line, explain to them what it meant, and even name the guy who came up with that line. They actually tested me.

Ello…… I won’t go and get a tattoo and not know the meaning lor. It’s like someone getting a Japanese Kanji tattoo like ”馬鹿”, and walking around flaunting it, without knowing the meaning. It means STUPID you stupid cow.

Anyhoo…. The Boy and I went to a Chinese sinseh once, and while the sinseh was massaging my knee, he told The Boy: “Eh, you go and get 5 stars lah, then you can win your girlfriend already.”

-_-”

You go and get one big star, can win my 4 stars already lor.

And I’m gonna change the color of my wrist tatt. I’ve decided to get it black since the current color ain’t working out the way I want it too.

In the end, black’s still the best and most reliable.

My neck is still annoying me.

Along with a few other people.

Heh.

I’d quite like to, and rather punch the daylights out of you than to talk to you. I mean, if I’m going to waste time talking to you, I might as well use that time and punch you.

Either way you’re taking up my time.

SILENCE! I KEEL YOU!

Ya.

Like those people on the streets, especially Orchard. Talk talk talk, I walk away, you walk walk and talk talk. I wave you away, you still talk talk talk. Best.

SILENCE!!!!! I KEEEEEEL YOU!!!!!!!

It’s not only those people on the streets. Cases in other scenarios too.

Phoar. I feel like laughing out loud now.

Because hor, somethings in life are just so stupid, illogical, unreasonable, absurd, and best of all, unfair.

And we’re all chasing them.

And we’re still doing them.

Vicious cycle I tell ya.

I’m going to laugh my ass off now.

But before that, I’d like to ask you a coupla questions. I’d appreciate if you give reasons too. And yes, answer only if you’re bored out of your mind. If not, just pretend I’m talking to my evil twin.

1) Would you rather slog your guts away for half your life, and enjoy the other half OR slog three-quarters of your life, and enjoy your last quarter, assuming everything is a 100%. (Note the italics! It’s there for a reason lor.)

2) If you were a surgeon doing an open brain operation, and there was a bomb just waiting to explode in the next O.R, would you evacute when told to, or continue operating on your patient despite evacuation orders? (Yes yes, scene from Grey’s Anatomy, which I’m so addicted to.)

3) What would you answer to the statement “The grass is always greener on the other side”?

4) Logical thinking, or following your heart/instinct?

5) You think women think logically, or more on following their heart/instinct?

*Raises one eyebrow*

Can’t wait to see answers, if there are any to start with. They’re not trick questions. I especially can’t wait for answers to number 5. That doesn’t mean you don’t answer that on purpose and deprive me!

// Oh Kimmies, thanks for introducing that online shop to me. But me no likey those stuff. How? Wanna donate your clothes to me?

And Jie, you trying to be funny? Singapore where got four seasons. If there is, when’s winter? Oh I know. Winter’s in my room, with the air con on.

Or you can also go to any shopping centre with full blast super cold air con. That’s Singapore’s winter at its best.

And about the “why I’m not working” thingy, read this post again.

I need to go shopping. I’m getting really bored of my clothes.

And what’s with the gloomy weather? What’s with the rain? It’s April for God’s sake!

And it’s still too hot.

I’m really sleepy.

I could get used to this lifestyle – Not working, just slacking.

Muhahaha.

My friends in Osaka has been telling me to take it easy and not find a job so soon. Go on a trip or do something while I’m still free, because when I start work again, I ain’t gonna have time for myself.

I would love to go travelling and stuff, but The Boy is working. -.-”

I ain’t complaining though. We’re always looking forward to the weekends, because that’s when I’ll be staying over at his place. Sooner or later, I’d be a permanent fixture in his house.

I never knew anyone could make me so rooted.

Sometimes I look at him and I wonder how did God every created someone so awesome. And I’m glad he’s mine.

With age, comes wisdom. For me, it goes this way – With The Boy, comes wisdom and stability.

Oh, I should stop. *blush*

And the point of this entry?

To let you know I’m still alive and kicking. And very happy. Teehee!